The Recurring Generations
by doublequartereighthnote
Summary: There was a knock on the Tardis door. Who knocks on the door of a big blue box in the center of London? Some one who is desperate and unafraid. The Doctor opens the door only to be looking in a mirror of what he once was. How is this regeneration looking at him? Talking to him? Only the Doctor can help this "John Smith" remember that he is not just an average londoner.


"Doctor, who is that?" Amy called, staring at Her raggedy man who was eyeing another man with wild hair and thick black glasses.

"No one. Get in the Tardis Amy, now."

"But Doctor-."

"I said NOW!"

The redhead backed away to the time machine, ducking inside, leaving the doctor to deal with the familiar face. "Who in this wide universe do you think you are?" He hissed, not in the mood for anyones mind tricks.

The other brunette laughed and looked down. "I don't know. I need your help...I remember a life before. But it doesn't seem right. Everything seems fake, like I took someone else's life while I was replaced," The man's smile faded. He looked up at the Doctor, seriousness flooding onto his face. "There were these women. When I saw them, I knew them. But I don't remember ever meeting them. One of them hugged me and said they had missed me and when I told her I didn't remember our meeting she got mad and slapped me and left. The other one only saw me and just stared for a moment but I felt that she recognized me. She started sobbing and when I went up to her and asked what was wrong she just told me that she didn't know. She just saw me and started crying. I don't know why but I started crying with her. She left after that. She didn't want to speak to me anymore." Tears arose in the stranger's eyes, streaking his face with salty water "I just wanted to know! I wanted to remember! I have this feeling in the back of my mind that i'm forgetting something important!"

The Doctor's eyes flooded as well, they didn't dare fall. He remembers those two. He knows why they cried. He knows why they left. He knows. "Names... did you get names of these women?"

"No. They left before I could ask. Doctor, please, I've been tracking you down because someone told me I would be able to find help if I found you. Please, help me find out who I am."

The Doctor's eyes widened. "Who told you to find me?!"

"An old man named Wilf. He told me about the big blue box and that he knew you and if anyone could help me it was you."

The Doctor frowned. "What's your name?"

"John. John Smith."

A pit formed in the bottom of the Doctor's stomach. "Well the Mr. Smith I'm going to need to to come with me. And while you do, I need to tell me everything about your life. Follow me." The Doctor spun on his heels and went to the Tardis. John Smith went in after him. The time traveler stopped on the stairs to his control panel, waiting for this John Smith to say the famous _"It's bigger on the inside"_ line. It didn't come. "What do you think?" The Doctor asked.

John Smith looked all around. "A bit modern but it still feels like home." He blinked, confused.

Amy was furious. "Doctor, who is he and why did he say that?! Is a time lord!? I thought you said there were no more time lords!" She hissed.

"Amy, be quiet. I'm talking to our guest." He snapped politely. "So Mr. Smith! Tell me about your life! Where did you grow up? How were the teen aged years? What do you do? Do you have a family? What?"

John Smith shook his head. "I told you Doctor, I have some memories but they don't seem real. I had a mother and a father, Peter and Sarah Jane Smith, my sister named Jenny. I just... I can't remember what any of them sound like or act like. Their faces are so blurry. Doctor what are you doing?" John smith mumbled as the doctor placed a stethoscope onto his chest.

"Nothing... just keep talking." The cold metal moved from the left side of John Smith's body to the right. _One heart..._ The doctor thought to himself.

"And I keep getting this odd feeling that I have a twin... I'm not sure why... But whenever I have dreams of one my hand always hurts afterwards."

The Doctor's ears perked up. "Dreams? Do you have weird dreams?" John Smith nodded, looking shocked that the Doctor seemed to know about them. "Tell me about them."

John Smith looked at his ratty converse. "I have a journal...it's for my dreams... They are so real I started drawing and writing about them. They're so...odd." John Smith took the journal out of his pocket and started flipping through it. "I drew a bunch of people that I think I know but I don't have a memory of them..." He picked a page that showed most of the faces John Smith saw.

The Doctor took the journal from him and stared at the pages. He knew every face. John had scribbled all over the pictures and pages. The Doctor flipped through all of them all of the pages looked like a memory from his own past. His whole existence could be scratched down in the leather bound pages. Frustration boiled inside of him. "How?" He growled.

"How what, Doctor?" John Smith asked innocently.

The Doctor charged at John Smith, pushing his shoulders against the walls of the Tardis. _"How are you possible?!"_ The Doctor shouted at him. John's eye were wide and scared. "You are _me_. A past _version_ of _me_! How are you here?! How are you walking around!? Why do you get to have memories of a mother and father?! Everyone in my family is dead! It physically _hurts_ me to remember them!" His voice sharpens. "Those aren't your Parents!" He spits. "Sarah Jane is someone we _left_! Some _I_ left! Shes not your mother! Jenny was my - our - daughter! She died because she was too much like me! Your face was the last thing she saw! Those women know you because they knew me! Donna and Martha! Those are their names! I hurt them! Your _face_ hurt them! You went _mad!_ Thats why I have a new face! You were alone! So _I_ was born." His eyes glared down at him. "Who. Are. You?! Why don't you remember?!"

John Smith was shaking he didn't know what to say or what to do so he kept on staring at the Doctor still frightened beyond belief. The Doctor saw this and let him go. He was useless if he couldn't speak. The Doctor gave up for a moment, turning his back to John Smith.

John sighed for a moment, collecting his words and thoughts that he deemed too odd or irrelevant until that moment. "Doctor... Three years ago... Is the only time I have memories of my adult life. After that... The memories start with those three people... And now that you... Said that she wasn't my mother... I _feel_ like thats true. Calling her mum... It doesn't feel right... What you said... I _feel_ it Doctor..."

The Doctor thought for a moment. "Stay here." He mumbled before taking off into the depths of the Tardis.

John smith took this opportunity to look around. Everything seemed to sleek and new and just plain cold. "You seem much more alive than what you're showing," he said to the middle of the control panel. He thought she should have warmer colors than all the blues and greens. "But, you're still a beauty." His hand goes to graze the control but his hand was slapped away.

"Only the Doctor can fly the Tardis." Amy said, leaning on the panel.

"Oh, well, I wasn't going to fly her, I was just looking."

"How do you know it's a her?"

"She looks like one."

"Why did you come here?"

"I thought the Doctor could help me."

"Are you human?"

"As far as I know."

"Who are you?"

"I'm th-" He stopped. He didn't know what he was going to say. All he knew was that the name that was about to come out of his mouth was _not_ John Smith.

"Mr. Smith!" The Doctor called as he trotted down the stairs with arms full of things. He dumped them on the seats by the railing and dug through them. "If I ask you what these thing are or if you remember them you have to answer me as quickly as possible. Understand? Perfect, now what is this?" The Doctor flashed psychic paper at the other man's face.

"A blank sheet of paper."

A goofy smile flashed on the Doctor's lips. "Alright, what is this?" The "Timey Wimey" detector rose besides his head.

"Some sort of tape recorder?"

A frown. "And this?" The Doctor held up his sonic screwdriver.

"Thats... Is that a screwdriver?" John Smith asked. It didn't look like a normal screwdriver. _He_ just thought it looked like one.

"Yes! Perfect!" The Doctor started showing his little things from his time such as the pocketwatch, one of Rose's shirts, and even went as far as to show him the old coat that he wore in his past generation.

"Doctor I don't know what purpose this serves but it's not helping- _Ah_!" John Smith gasped and hunched over, gripping his head searing pain shot through his temples and blocked all thought to his brain. He screamed from the back of his throat, scratching it raw. "Doctor! Help me! I-It hurts!"

The Doctor just looked at him for a moment. Calm and collected, he took out a stack of drawings of his own, he kneeled before John Smith. "I know it hurts. I know it feels like a million suns sitting and burning on your head but you've got to answer these questions."

Hot tears poured from John Smith's eyes. "I can feel the earth spinning!" He cried.

"I know. Just look at me please? Okay, look up and tell me what you see."

John Smith's eyes pried themselves open and landed on the pictures in front of him. He knew the name instantly. "Thats a Dalek." The picture turned. "Cybermen." Another picture. "The Angels... The water on mars... The ood... The master." People's faces started appearing. The faces of those women. "Donna Noble and Martha Jones...Captain Jack Harkness... Jackie Tyler... Pete Tyler... Mickey Smith... Rose Tyler- Ah!" A strike of pain stabbed its way to the back of his head.

He felt like he was going to fall off the earth. It was spinning and spinning and spinning and wouldn't stop. He felt each lap it was racing to finish. Claws started at the top of his head all the way down to his neck, cutting off his air. His breathing became labored and painful. A lump sat itself on his chest, pressing down on his lungs even harder. His hand were shaking so violently they would jerk in random directions. He almost hit the Doctor a few times. Though the time traveler didn't seem to mind. The shaking slowly moved itself throughout John Smith's body, making him fall to the floor.

All the while, the Doctor watched it all. Overseeing the tragic scene. Amy spied from the corner, even though she regretted it. It was like a car accident. No matter how gut wrenching, you just can't look away. "D-Doctor," She whispered, moving slowly over to the man with the bowtie. "Doctor you have to save him. You have to help him. Stop this."

****"I can't, Amy...Hes... waking up."

* * *

**Holy fuck balls. I just. I don't know what I'm doing. I promise. This is the first time i'm writing the doctor. And you know what I don't think it's thats bad. I think its terrible but not atrocious. Plus I haven't gotten any feed back. But eh whats the harm? Thanks for reading! I don't know why you did. If you like Hetalia and/or gay just head over to my other stories please? Hahaha anyways, review! Thank you so much!**


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